Waiting and in a Bad Mood Memory

It's cold. I'm standing outside with other officers. I think it's the spring of 1918, and I'm standing on the airfield with Karl Bodenschatz. I'm looking through the binoculars. It's late afternoon. We're expecting some planes to return. Karl is to my right, and I think some of the mechanics are standing behind us. The sky is clear and the sun is due to set in about an hour. I'm very intent on watching the sky. Karl keeps looking over at me. He's not wearing a coat, just his uniform jacket. He must be cold. Everyone else is wearing their coats. He's standing with his hands clasped behind his back.

I'm having a hard time with this memory. Parts are clear others are not. I stop looking through the binoculars with a certain feeling of disgust. The sun has set and there is only the glow of light in the sky. No one landed. Nothing happened. I'm in a bad mood now. I keep quiet and stern in front of everyone, but inside I'm upset, disgusted, and very tired. I turn away from the direction in which I was looking and sorta thrust the binoculars into Karl's hands. He somewhat surprised grasps them as I walk off. The mechanics are no longer standing behind us. I walk across an open area near a large building or tent, it's a hangar. I'm at the airfield where everything is pen except for a row of trees/bushes on a small slope.

I'm walking alone, and I don't want anyone bothering me. I go inside a building and I shut myself into the darkness of the room. I cup my face into my hands and I'm really upset and frustrated. I don't know what the hell I'm going to do. I let some of the emotion out and then calmed down. I take off my coat and hat, scarf, and sit down on a cot and take off my boots. I lay down. There is a window to my left. My head hurts and I can't relax to make it go away. The room is a bit chilly. I just can't get comfortable. I don't know how long this lasts, but I finally sit up and put my boots back on. I figure getting something to eat will make me feel better. I go out. I get the impression that I feel isolated from everyone. I'm not sure why, but I feel very alone.